Wednesday, March 07, 2007
Should I Pursue This Guy?
Dear Guidance Guy,
I've know this boy since the 6th grade, and I am now in 8th. He is one of my best friends. The problem is, I think I'm starting to like him as more than a friend. I told him once, and he said he didn't like me. He doesn't know that I still like him, but he knows that I used to. Judging by the way he acts, I think he might have lied about not liking me to protect the friendship. But that might just be wishful thinking.
I'm so confused, and I'm not sure if I should say anything, and if so what should I say? How can I handle this and still avoid being hurt?
Amber
P.S. Usually I disregard middle school relationships because they often don't last, but my sister and her husband met in the 6th grade and they got married almost two years ago.
*** *** ***
Dear Amber,
I'll start my answer with this...this is no way to guarantee not getting hurt. It's part of growing up. You're right about most middle school relationships not lasting. Usually they are practice for the longer lasting adult relationships. Of course there are exceptions, like your sister.
As far as what to say, you've already told him how you feel. No matter what reason he's giving you, he's made how he feels pretty clear. That leaves you with the choice of taking it another step.
There's no easy answer, but I used to be an eighth grade boy (many many many years ago). If I were him I'd feel like I was being chased after. It wouldn't feel good. It would just put more strain on the friendship. Maybe he feels differently. But that's for you to decide.
Don't take any of this too seriously. It's supposed to be fun, at least most of the time!
Thanks for your letter,
The Guidance Guy
I've know this boy since the 6th grade, and I am now in 8th. He is one of my best friends. The problem is, I think I'm starting to like him as more than a friend. I told him once, and he said he didn't like me. He doesn't know that I still like him, but he knows that I used to. Judging by the way he acts, I think he might have lied about not liking me to protect the friendship. But that might just be wishful thinking.
I'm so confused, and I'm not sure if I should say anything, and if so what should I say? How can I handle this and still avoid being hurt?
Amber
P.S. Usually I disregard middle school relationships because they often don't last, but my sister and her husband met in the 6th grade and they got married almost two years ago.
*** *** ***
Dear Amber,
I'll start my answer with this...this is no way to guarantee not getting hurt. It's part of growing up. You're right about most middle school relationships not lasting. Usually they are practice for the longer lasting adult relationships. Of course there are exceptions, like your sister.
As far as what to say, you've already told him how you feel. No matter what reason he's giving you, he's made how he feels pretty clear. That leaves you with the choice of taking it another step.
There's no easy answer, but I used to be an eighth grade boy (many many many years ago). If I were him I'd feel like I was being chased after. It wouldn't feel good. It would just put more strain on the friendship. Maybe he feels differently. But that's for you to decide.
Don't take any of this too seriously. It's supposed to be fun, at least most of the time!
Thanks for your letter,
The Guidance Guy
# posted by Larry Hochman : 1:53 PM
