Friday, January 26, 2007
Sexual Identity Crisis
Dear Guidance Guy,
I'm a 13 year old guy. Lately I have been questioning my sexuality. It's weird because I have a girlfriend and I used to like her but now I'm just not feeling it. Sometimes when I'm with her I notice myself staring at other guys. I just feel like I'm changing in a lot of ways. I feel like when I'm with my friends, and their talking about girls I feel awkward and out of place. My girlfriend is great, but I'm not interested. When I'm with my friends who are girls are their talking about guys I feel like I'm in the right place.
I haven't told anyone about how I feel and I can't fake it anymore. I'm not sure about my sexuality. I mean, am I bi or gay? I'm not sure. Guys are my interest now. I dont know what changed but I need help going through whatever this is. I need help to figure out everything. Please help me out.
Confused and Unsure
*** *** ***
Dear Confused and Unsure,
It looks to me like you're definitely going through a sexual identity crisis. There's one piece of good news. You're 13 years old, and having these kind of issues are normal for all kids, even if they turn out to be gay or bisexual.
There's one more thing...you don't have to decide what you are. At your age, there's a lot of pressure to put a label on yourself. You're a jock, or a brain, or a geek, or straight, or gay, etc. Those labels help the rest of the world decide who and what you are, but what the world thinks doesn't matter. The only important thing is what you think of yourself.
If you have an adult you can trust, it's a great idea to talk with him or her about this. A parent would be the best person, if you feel comfortable talking about sexual matters, and you feel like they'll be OK with what you say to them. A school counselor or social worker can either help you or point you in the right direction.
Whether you're gay, straight or bisexual, you are just as important and valuable to the rest of the world. If you're OK with who you are, I promise you'll find your place in the world.
All The Best,
The Guidance Guy
I'm a 13 year old guy. Lately I have been questioning my sexuality. It's weird because I have a girlfriend and I used to like her but now I'm just not feeling it. Sometimes when I'm with her I notice myself staring at other guys. I just feel like I'm changing in a lot of ways. I feel like when I'm with my friends, and their talking about girls I feel awkward and out of place. My girlfriend is great, but I'm not interested. When I'm with my friends who are girls are their talking about guys I feel like I'm in the right place.
I haven't told anyone about how I feel and I can't fake it anymore. I'm not sure about my sexuality. I mean, am I bi or gay? I'm not sure. Guys are my interest now. I dont know what changed but I need help going through whatever this is. I need help to figure out everything. Please help me out.
Confused and Unsure
*** *** ***
Dear Confused and Unsure,
It looks to me like you're definitely going through a sexual identity crisis. There's one piece of good news. You're 13 years old, and having these kind of issues are normal for all kids, even if they turn out to be gay or bisexual.
There's one more thing...you don't have to decide what you are. At your age, there's a lot of pressure to put a label on yourself. You're a jock, or a brain, or a geek, or straight, or gay, etc. Those labels help the rest of the world decide who and what you are, but what the world thinks doesn't matter. The only important thing is what you think of yourself.
If you have an adult you can trust, it's a great idea to talk with him or her about this. A parent would be the best person, if you feel comfortable talking about sexual matters, and you feel like they'll be OK with what you say to them. A school counselor or social worker can either help you or point you in the right direction.
Whether you're gay, straight or bisexual, you are just as important and valuable to the rest of the world. If you're OK with who you are, I promise you'll find your place in the world.
All The Best,
The Guidance Guy
# posted by Larry Hochman : 4:14 PM
