Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Harrassment from Ex-Best Friend
Dear Guidance Guy,
I used to have this friend, we'll name her Joe. I also have a boyfriend, we can call him Bob. Well, Joe hooked me and Bob up even though she has the biggest crush on Bob. She started getting jealous when Bob and I started really falling in love (yes, I know that sounds really cliché because I'm so young, but I do know what real love is.) One night she just called me out of the blue and tried to convince me he was cheating on me. I know that was a lie because she also tried to convince Bob that I was cheating on him. Now Joe and I are not friends anymore and she keeps harrassing me. By harrassing me, I mean calling me up and calling me names.
I really don't want to cause anymore conflict, but I really want to be left alone. Do you have any advice as to how I can stop her from harrassing me?
Just want to be left alone.
*** *** ***
Dear Just,
If you want her to leave you alone, hang up each time she calls. No conversation, no telling her to leave you alone - nothing. Just hang up. Eventually she'll get tired of talking to an empty receiver. And block her calls if you can. Denying access to you is the only thing that will cause her to stop calling. And if continues, you or your parents can talk to the police about harrassment charges.
Now...what I find interesting is the whole story you told me before you asked your question. It shouldn't matter why she's calling. Something tells me this issue is unresolved for you, and you'd like to express your anger at her for the accusations she made. Let it go. Someone who tells those kinds of stories is very unhappy. Don't get dragged into the mud with her. Move onto the next part of your life. And let her go to work on healing herself.
All The Best,
The Guidance Guy
I used to have this friend, we'll name her Joe. I also have a boyfriend, we can call him Bob. Well, Joe hooked me and Bob up even though she has the biggest crush on Bob. She started getting jealous when Bob and I started really falling in love (yes, I know that sounds really cliché because I'm so young, but I do know what real love is.) One night she just called me out of the blue and tried to convince me he was cheating on me. I know that was a lie because she also tried to convince Bob that I was cheating on him. Now Joe and I are not friends anymore and she keeps harrassing me. By harrassing me, I mean calling me up and calling me names.
I really don't want to cause anymore conflict, but I really want to be left alone. Do you have any advice as to how I can stop her from harrassing me?
Just want to be left alone.
*** *** ***
Dear Just,
If you want her to leave you alone, hang up each time she calls. No conversation, no telling her to leave you alone - nothing. Just hang up. Eventually she'll get tired of talking to an empty receiver. And block her calls if you can. Denying access to you is the only thing that will cause her to stop calling. And if continues, you or your parents can talk to the police about harrassment charges.
Now...what I find interesting is the whole story you told me before you asked your question. It shouldn't matter why she's calling. Something tells me this issue is unresolved for you, and you'd like to express your anger at her for the accusations she made. Let it go. Someone who tells those kinds of stories is very unhappy. Don't get dragged into the mud with her. Move onto the next part of your life. And let her go to work on healing herself.
All The Best,
The Guidance Guy
# posted by Larry Hochman : 1:55 PM
